3 BAD DAD Sean moves his paperwork to the patio so he can keep an eye on Jeff and Maria as they play in the pool. Soon his father walks in. "Dad, you're supposed to call first." "I just happened to be in the neighborhood and I don't have a cell phone, you know." "That's not acceptable, Dad!" Jeff, in the meantime, jumps out of the pool, runs up to them, happily greeting Louis, "Hi grandpa!" Sean's head sinks as his father stutters in shock, "Sh-Sh-Sean, d-d-did you elope!" "No Dad. Jeff just calls me Dad, so you're Grandpa!" Sternly, getting to what really troubles him, "Sean, why in God's name, is Jeff naked! Why is he naked in front of his girlfriend! Jeff, cover yourself, already!" Fearlessly naked, Jeff replies, "With all due respect, sir, only you broke a rule." "Jeff, you have broken God's rules. I warn you Sean, in Mark 9:42 Jesus says, 'If anyone causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to be thrown into the sea with a large millstone tied around his neck.'" "Dad, you have warned me, and likewise, I warn you! You teach Puritan tradition like it's holy writ. Jeff, why don't you go play with Maria again?" As Jeff scampers off, Sean adds, "What beautiful innocence!" "Sean, how could you teach him this?!" Jeff turns and proclaims, "I taught him!" then jumps into the pool. "My, oh my! So Rachel is a nudist, huh?!" Mustering up all the confidence he can, "Yes, Dad. I can't tell you how wonderful it is." "Son, I love you. Where did I go wrong? You don't run around naked too, do you?" Taking a deep breathe, "Of course, Dad. You don't know what you're missing!" "Oh dear! God help me! Do you actually believe you can be a Christian and a nudist too?" "Well, you know I lost all respect for the church, but yes, I'm convinced!" "Oh, how I wish you were with Roxanne yet." "She understands and respects my choice." "Sean, I respect you highly for your independent thinking, rather than kissing up to hypocrites. But this just hurts me to the core." "You've seen Jeff and Maria playing naked for a while now. Do you sense any hint of lewdness?" "No, Sean, can't say that I do. But..." 4 BOMB MOM "Hi Mom. You look exhausted." "Yeah, Jeff. I had a busy day." "We sure got Grandpa's blood sizzling today." "My parents came over while I was working?" "No. No. Sean's Dad." "Oh! Uh oh! You mean Louis walked in unannounced?!" "You got it!" "I need to sit down.... So he caught you naked?!" "Maria and I were in the pool when he barged in." "Oh, good! You were naked but he couldn't tell." Jeff smiles, "I figured that this would be a good time to hit him with reality--when he was in the wrong." "What!!! What did you do?! No. Don't tell me!" "I ran over and said hi to him." "Quit playing with me, Jeff!" Sean walks in and gives Rachael a big hug and kiss. "Sean, what happened with your Dad???" "Well, let's just say that your son has humongous gonads." "No! No! No! No! No!" "And I'm proud of him! I've been agonizing over how to confront my Dad for weeks now. Jeff just made it real simple. It couldn't have gone any better." "OK, I believe you because I'm too tired not to. I'm just gonna take a nap now."
